XXVIII. The Boxing Day Blues.

Now comes the time of withdraws. This is the reason I hate Christmas: It comes to an end far too fast for my little mind.

Gone now is the Christmas music on the radio. The Yule Log on the telly came to an end too fast last night. It seems that the season just started for me and BOOM! Now it has ended.

I do love the Christmas season. I am a purest. DO NOT have Christmas things BEFORE Thanksgiving. No sales! No music! No decorations! No nothing Christmas before the Day of Thanks. But the moment the bird is in the belly and Santa ends the Macy's Day Parade then we can go FULL BORE CHRISTMAS!

Its not the gift giving and the commercial end of Christmas I like. In fact the commercial end can just go to Hades for all I care. Its that true thing about Christmas that I love, the reason Christ is in mas. The gift giving is something I do like as long as it does not go out of hand. Its a symbol of the gift God gave us with His Son. But you don't need 'Black Friday' for that.

The gathering of family and friends is always nice, although for me the gatherings have been getting smaller and smaller as time goes on. This is something that does distress me a bit when I remember the huge clans that came together in my youth to celebrate the holiday. But enjoy what you have, that's what I say.

The food, oh the food. Turkey and Ham. Mashed potatoes and corn. Lemon bars and fudge. Wine and mead! The things that are put in our bellies that also seems to fuel the soul.

Needless to say that the music and the church services always lend a bit of joy in my heart. The start of a new church year after the LONG so many days after Pentecost season.

But now as we reach the day after, I feel the withdraws coming. It will go away in a few days. But it will be there. But there is always next year, and with that a smile comes to my face. So I hope you all had a great Christmas and as the New Year comes upon us I trust that this you will ring it out with smiles and look for to the new one with hope for a better year.


Eririk Farwanderer
26 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

XXVII. The Loss of TV Innocence.

It seems so long ago when every medium to major market had it's own local kids show. Here in the Twin Cities we have several from Clancy the Cop, Axel, Captain 11 and good old Casey Jones.

These shows were innocent and fun, the kind of thing that not only kids looked forward to watching but their parents. At lunch time kids would run home for their meals and a chance to watch Casey Jones and Roundhouse Rodney.

The bits were cheesy and silly, and although innocent could offend the knee-jerk set that wants to find ill in everything.

And that's just what happened. A group of mothers with nothing better to do forced many of these shows off the air because they DARED have adds aimed at their little angels. One by one they fell and these local shows went away. The last of these was the Bozo Show in Chicago that lasted into the 90's. But alas that is now gone.

But these local show hosts were GIANTS. When I met Casey (aka Roger Awsumb) as a teen at a local train show I was dumb struck. I could hardly say a word with my hero there.

Sadly they are now gone in other ways. Casey died in 2002. Clancy the Cop not too long ago. Roundhouse passed on while the show was on the air.

I feel for this generation that never had a chance to enjoy these local giants that gave the gift of true entertainment for so many years. And shame of those moms that helped bring an end to it and usher the garbage we have to offer the children of today.

As Axel once said: 'Oh look, they are carrying out the Jule Log. Nope, it's just Melly Jazz'.


Eirik Farwanderer
20 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

XXVI. Just Remembering.

I watched Avatar: The Last Airbender with my daughter. It is truly is a good show.

One character always stands out, and I never knew why until an episode called "The Tales of Ba Sing Se". It was an episode of mini episodes, one of which focused on Uncle Iroh.

At the end of that segment it had a tribute to the man who provided the voice, Mako.

It was he that put the spirit and live into that character.

I had always loved watching Mako on film and TV and was saddened to hear of his passing in 2006. It was just another reminder of the talent we are loosing, and the void that is not being refilled.

I will confess, I do tear up at the end of the segment of "The Tales of Ba Sing Se"...

...because I always loved Mako.


Eirik Farwanderer
18 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

XXV. Joys of a Pipe.

Yes, I am a pipe and cigar smoker.

I hate cigarettes. Will not touch them. Not being judgmental to those that do smoke them, not at all. Its just not my thing.

I have been smoking a pipe since I was 15 years old, the only juvenile delinquent to do so that I knew of. Now with me aged 41, that's over 25 years.

I blame pipe smokes such as Tolkien and Lewis. Twain and Churchill. Karloff and Doyle. Men of great minds, minds that I could never match. How I wished to be like those men...

...no, I really do not blame them at all. I just always enjoyed the smell of a pipe, and the taste.

Yes, the taste. You see, you savor a pipe. You draw in the smoke and let it swirl around in your mouth, never taking it into the lungs. I know some do, but I don't.

Like teas and coffee, tobacco comes in a number of flavors. Each one unique. Each person preferring one over another. Get two pipe smokers together and smell the clash of individuality.

And how relaxing it is to sit back and puff on the pipe in the evening. Maybe with a single malt scotch or a fine beer.

Yes, I am a pipe and cigar smoker and will always be. Even if they outlaw smoking you will find me at the 'Smokeeasys' puffing away...


Eirik Farwanderer
17 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

XXIV. Mind Wanderings...

The other night I was watching 'Poker After Dark' on DVR. What is so entertaining about 'Poker After Dark' is the table talk between the players. Now I know that some events wish to get rid of the table talk. BUT table talk is part of the game. The stories and prop bets and the digging for info and tells.

Now on that week of episodes one of the best Omaha Hi/Pot Limit players by the name of Robert Williamson was on. Now one point he brought up was how he still got Coke (For us in the North Coke is the brand, not all soda/pop/colas) in bottles because that is the best way to drink the things. Now I could not agree more. In fact for a treat I like to hit Mexican aisle of the super market to get a bottle of Coke made in Mexico. They still use cain sugar instead of that corn goop we have in the States, just like the old days.

Now that reminds me of when I was a youth (well early teens) and I spent some parts of my summer with my late Uncle Vern in a rented cabin by the lake. Uncle Vern was a dried out booze hound, and did it all by himself. No 30 day chip needed for that stubborn German/Norwegian. So what we did was load up the fridge with bottles of Coke (This was the mid 80's) and play Cribbage well into the night while listening to the radio and the loons. He would go out early and fish, and I would have to clean the suckers. But what was great was the Commander Inn Garbage Pizza. Both Uncle Vern and I could hold our own when it came to eat, BUT, the Commander Inn Garbage Pizza would always do us in. Had to bring back half the thing to nibble over the night over Cribbage.

Cribbage was taught to me by my Dad. Many hours was played between us at home and in bars. I do not know how many bars in your area have Cribbage Boards, but up here in Minnesnowcold we have a few. Others would come and go trying their hand at it, but the most hours was between my Dad and I and Uncle Vern and I. But as time went along I moved to poker. Texas Hold'Em and Omaha and the such playing in the bar leagues. I'm not too bad at it really...

Which reminds me, I was watching 'Poker After Dark' the other night...


Eirik Farwanderer
16 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

XXIII. Bilbo Goes Beeb.

In the days of old, radio was the TV of its day with shows that spanned from the local ballroom to science fiction. Movies such as A Christmas Story and Woody Allen's Radio Days help convey what an impact they where for those generations that sat in front of the tube-warmed box that invited these programs into their homes.

Then came Television that all but killed those golden days of story telling and many of those programs are only distant memories to all those that enjoyed them. But the BBC (British Broadcasting Company) has kept people that have a yen for radio programs entertained to this day. Sure, NPR gives us some radio shows, but the BBC has done so in earnest. The most powerful program was Douglas Adams SF comedy The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy that spawned a trilogy of five books (only Adams could do that) a six part TV program and a comic series. But we are not going to take a look at his work in this re-review, instead we will look at the BBC's 1988 effort to convert J.R.R. Tolkien's The Hobbit.

One of the things that bothers me with books on tape is the fact that they are either abridged or if they are not, who can handle a person reading to you for about twelve hours? I have always been a fan of taking a book, and then faithfully produce it as a radio play. The BBC has done this with The Hobbit, the prelude to the classic Lord of The Rings trilogy and has been nice enough to let Bantam Books release it in the US on both tape and CD for us to enjoy.

As with the book, the story is centered around a Hobbit named Bilbo Baggins and his adventures with thirteen dwarfs who wish to reclaim their underground kingdom from an evil dragon named Smaug. Both the narrator and Bilbo keep the listeners informed of what is going on as the action takes place, which if done wrong could be annoying, but is masterfully done in this production. Along with an excellent cast, all music is done with medieval instruments in the style that was done in the middle ages.

Some problems do arise in this production though. One; sometimes the action gets "too intense" and it is hard to understand just what the heck is going on with all the commotion. Too much orc screaming and dwarf yelling can make it hard to understand who is doing what in that particular seine. Two; the volume levels can change on a person rather fast, where a conversation between Bilbo and Gandolf is so quiet that you have to turn the volume up as high as you can, then BOOM, the action starts to happen and you blow your speakers out. OK, maybe not that bad, but it can be quite annoying. Three; this is not really a big complaint, just a humorous side note, some of the goblins sound rather like Daleks from Doctor Who. Well, what can a person say, this is the BBC after all.

Overall, this is a great prelude to be enjoyed by the whole family, if so inclined. It is also a nice production to warm a person up for the upcoming Hobbit movie coming around 2011. A side note, the BBC has also done the Lord of The Rings as a radio play that can also be purchased at your local book store.

The radio play runs 240 minutes and is distributed by Bantam Books. Enjoy!


Eirik Farwanderer
16 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

XXII. You Know Your a Nerd/Geek When...

You know your a Nerd/Geek when:

You heard that Richard Hatch won the first Survivor and you say to yourself "So thats what he has been doing since Battlestar Galatica."

You wonder how a Crab can have a Whale for a daughter (YES its still bugging me!).

You know what the smeg in Smeghead means.

You know where the word Smeghead comes from.

You correct people on the correct way to say Tolkien.

You have called 911 because you have been buried under that stack of books by your bed.

You wonder what that button is for a split second before you press it...

...that's it. My brain is officially fried! It feels like it has been pounded on by a lemon peel wrapped around a brick. Feel free to add more.


Eirik Farwanderer
13 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

XXI. On the First Amendment.

With Liberty comes a price. One Price is the 'Freedom of Speech"

As the First Amendment says:

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances."

How many have really looked at this before shooting their mouths off about this Amendment? Many cry of the Shouts of 'Separation of Church and State' and such. Where in these words does it say that?

This Amendment protects the Church FROM the state and keeps the state from entering into its affairs and from forcing the public to tithe to a State Church that they do not belong to.

Example: As with many nations in Europe there is a State Church. Norway and Germany is Lutheran. Italy is Roman Catholic. If One happened to belong to the Methodists in Norway, they would be forced to give money to the Lutheran church and would not have protection for their rights to assemble.

What this Amendment does NOT do is ignore or pretend that religion is not there. It is NOT against this Amendment for the Government to recognize a Church and its festivals.

It also keeps the Government from controlling political speech, or most importantly political thought. With the congress of today planning on violating this Amendment with the so called 'Fairness Doctrine" they start down that path of Political Tyranny that had Mussolini editing the papers of Italy and Goebbels in control of German media.

One wonders what the Party in control has to fear when they wish to stop the ideas and thoughts of those who do not agree with them. A new black list for a new century and punishment for those that do not march in goose-step with them.

One of the great crimes is how modern media has allowed those that riot to be called 'protesters', but as this Amendment states it is "the right of the people peaceably to assemble"! It is not a violation for the Government to crush those that take to the street as thugs and rioters causing harm to both people and property. In fact this is one of the major reasons we have Government: The protection of the citizen.

Liberty means that you protect those things that you do not agree with. Political Thought is one of them. Religious Thought is the other. When this is taken away we face a Dark Age, and how ironic that those who claim to be the champion of this Amendment cheer when its is abused for their own selfish needs.

Eirik Farwanderer
13 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

XX. An Obsession...

There is an obsession I have to confess to...

...it does keep me up at night...

...and for the life of me I have no idea why.

It is a simple question, but I do not think anyone has an answer...

...the question is this:

"How can a crab have a daughter that's a whale?"

If this now keeps you up at night don't blame me. Your the one reading my blog...


Eirik Farwanderer
12 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

XIX. An Odd Dream.

The other night I truly had an odd dream. I really cannot remember the whole thing, but the idea of it is fresh in my mind.

It was a conversation with a dead man...

David 'Chip' Reese to be exact. The late professional poker player.

Now why I would have such a dream I do not know. But he was dead. He was on the other side. I remember how surprised he looked when I told him how the poker world taken his death hard. That many players that knew him still have not shaken off the shock of his passing. He was even more surprised at my telling him that the $50K H.O.R.S.E. Tournament that he won in its first year would be named after him...

...why so surprised. Because even though the man knew he was one of the best, he was humble. He was courteous. He was a gentleman.

Maybe that is the lesson we must learn from him. Try to be the best, but remember that we are just people. That even if we are the top of the field, we must treat others as we would want them to treat us.

I never met Chip Reese, but maybe the other night I did...


Eirik Farwanderer
12 December, 2009 Anno Domini

XVIII. My Minnesota!

Sir Peter Ustinov spoke about 'HIS Russia', so I shall write of MY Minnesota.

I both love AND hate Minnesota. Yes, I think a true Minnesotan has both feelings, STRONG mind you, about our home. It is COLD in the winter. It is a dog froze to the fire-hydrant, tongue to the flag pole, nostrils froze together kinda cold. But the summers can be HOT. Not just Hot but humid. It is the kind of humid weather were you are drenched wet just opening your door, drowning to death walking to your car, underwear stuck to the crack of your bum kinda humid.

And don't get me started about the goof balls that are elected to office in this state, no matter WHAT party we are talking about. We are not called the Gopher state because we have so many of the little furry ground rats running around but because of the underground dealings that this states government had in the beginning, and still does.

Now I am sure that ALL know that both Price Roger Nelson (or 'The Artist') and Robert Zimmerman (aka Bob Dylan) both came from this wonderful state. But we also have F. Scott Fitzgerald, Terry Gilliam, Judy Garland, John Madden, Roger Maris, The Andrew Sisters, Winona Ryder, Charles Schulz, E. G. Marshall, Jessica Lange, Jane Russell, Kevin Sorbo, Tammy Faye Baker, Sinclair Lewis, Loni Anderson, the talentless Garrison Keillor, Marion Ross, Peter Graves, James Arness and the great clown himself Jesse 'I ain't got time to poop' Ventura.

Needless to say, all these people show that they could not wait to get the hell out of this state. Some even ADMIT that they came from here.

Count Ferdinand von Zeppelin had his balloon ride at Fort Snelling in 1863 giving him the idea of his great invention that bore his name (The Hindenburg is Minnesota's fault). At those same fields outside the fort several years later Lt. Col. G. A. Custer played polo before heading out to Little Big Horn.

It was a Minnesota that gave this nation Prohibition. Andrew John Volstead was from Granite Falls (and sadly a family member of mine) that authored the act that bore his name. I do not joke when I say that this is one of the most horrid things the government did and that we still suffer great negative effects from those 12 years of stupidity.

Now we do NOT have a Democratic party in this state. It is a pseudo third party known as the DFL or the Democratic-Farmer-Labor. The Farmer-Labor was a union of socialists and communists that banded together for the 'better of the state'. It was a true 3rd party that had 4 governors and several members that went to DC. In 1944 they banded with the Democrats and this party has remained strong since then.

As for communists we have old Jake Cooper, a man who started a Supermarket chain right here in Chaska, Minnesota. He so believed in this political system that he was a bodyguard for Leon Trotsky in Mexico and remained a Trotskyist until his death in 1990.

This is just a small list of things that can be blamed on good old Minnesota. I am sure I will follow up with more useless trivia in that Cliff Claven sort of way. Maybe I will also include the 'Largest Ball of Twine', then again maybe not.


Eirik Farwanderer
12 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

XVII. The Worse Beer I Have Ever Had.

Back when the Micro Beer/Brew Pub craze was in it's full there came many new places to try crafted beer. Anyone who knows me knows that I HATE wimpy watered down pee water, especially if it has the word 'lite' in it. For me 'light' stands for the colour of the beer, not 'less filling'. I will write later on my views on proper drinking but this is not the time for that yet.

With this craze came a new brew pub called 'The Brew Station' that was located in Shakopee near Marshall Avenue and the then new Highway 169. Now please note the very important word: WAS.

Now wanting to explore the world for new styles and crafts of beer I was more than happy to swing by and give a try. Joining me was my father and a friend I believe was Bruce Truman, but please forgive me I seemed to have forgotten over time. Now The Brew Station was also trying to pass itself off as a pizzeria also, which kinda gave me a warm feeling inside me, for pizza is one of the food groups (YES, it is a food group, don't try to fight me on this) that I enjoy far too often. So needless to say I was interested in what they offered in that area also.

Now I should have seen the ill omens the moment I walked into they place: Far TOO many quarter to half full pitchers of beer and no one around to 'enjoy' them. The other was looking at the menu and seeing what I deem as 'Metrosexual Pizza's'. These are the 'artsy fartsy' pizza's that people put ungodly items on, and will suffer in the afterlife for it.

Sitting down at the bar (looking at the almost full pitchers) the bartender rushes up with a giant smile and offered us FREE beer. Another ill omen. No bar OFFERS free beers. Maybe a sample but never a full free beer, and in this case a pitcher. Well, what the hell, free beer, lets give it a try...

...and into the valley of death rode the six hundred.

Now ones eyes should not cross when drinking beer unless it is the 'nectar of the gods'. Sadly my eyes crossed. Needless to say that this was not a good crossing of the eyes. Looking upon my drinking companions and seeing the same look on their faces that I assumed was on mine I came to the conclusion that the beer had the same effect on them as it did on me. This was the worse beer I had tasted, even worse then Bud Lite. In fact Bud Lite would have won the gold medal for brewing compared to this swamp water that was in my hand. The bartender was looking at us eager for praise, so I told him the biggest lie that would surly send me to hell if it was under a different situation, for I knew God would understand. I told him that it was very good. The other two just nodded unable to say anything and pleased as punch that I damned my soul for them.

The bartender smiled and rushed off to the other end of the bar to his next victims that just entered. Seeing our out we ran, and in running did something I have never done before or since: I left a full glass of beer behind me.

Needless to say the lesson that was learned was this. Just because the place is a brew pub does not mean they have good beer, or in this case, drinkable beer. The place closed up after a short time of poisoning people with bad brew and 'metrosexual pizza's' and is now a paint store, which I think is apt because paint would have tasted better.


Eirik Farwanderer
10 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

XVI. Triplanetary or Bust!

In the world of science fiction there have been many people hailed as the "first". Mary Shelley is with no argument the "Grandmother" of modern science fiction. With that H.G. Wells and Jules Verne both hold titles of being the "Fathers" of science fiction and Hugo Gernsback being the "Father" of the pulp science fiction that gave us such writers as Isaac Asimov, Frederik Pohl and A.E. VanVogt. So, what does this have to do with this re-review? Very simple. The book that we are going to take a look at is the first in a series that gave us the mighty "space opera", and its author is no other then a legend in SF, E.E. "Doc" Smith.

Triplanetary: A Tale of Cosmic Adventure was a book released by Fantasy Press in 1948 from a series of short stories published in Amazing Stories from January to April of 1934, with filler material to tie it together for the final book form. The story itself is the staging point for the Lensman series, a sort of a Hobbit to the Lord of the Rings where Smith introduces us to his world and the events that lead up to the next book, First Lensman, which is the true beginning of the Lensman saga.

Triplanetary is staged into three parts, the first taking us back millions of years to a time when two galaxies came together and formed what is now the Milky Way galaxy. At this time there are only two known races in the Universe: those of the planet Arisia and those of Eddore. The beings that live on Arisia are an advanced form of humanoid that had become almost a being of energy. They are peaceful, enjoy learning and are immortal. Those of Eddore are similar to insects, warlike and also immortal. The Arisian encounter the Eddorians by accident and realize that they are a true threat to the universe, so they make the Eddorians forget the encounter and start a plan to battle their new enemies. This leads to life forming and growing in the galaxy, including the planet we live on, Earth (called Tellus in the book). There we learn of the loss of Atlantis, a people more advanced then we are now, and an attempt to kill a Roman emperor. Both events are part of the hidden battle between those of Arisia and their unsuspecting foes from Eddore.

As the story continues, we enter the second section of the book, and some of the filler material that ties the short stories together. The part that I found most interesting is a semi-autobiographical time of Smiths life. It starts in 1918 with the US now part of the War effort in Europe and a young soldier named Captain Ralph Kinnison (Smiths alter ego) and his efforts to stay alive in battle. We flash forward to 1941 when Ralph Kinnison become involved with the war effort in the US with weapons manufacturing and the politics behind it all. Here we can see that Smith has an axe to grind over his entire experience and delivers his full frustration over the events in his life that gave us this chapter. We flash forward to the beginning of World War Three and another Kinnison, Theodore, who tries to protect the US from an incoming missile attack.

This leads into the third section that takes place into the far future where three planets have come together in the protection of the solar system, hence the title of the book: Triplanetary. We find that the big danger of the day are the pirates who prey on cargo ships and passenger liners, the worse being a man called Gray Roger. Roger is, in fact, a being from Eddore called Gharlane who launches his attacks of human and robot pirates from a mobile planetoid. Into the mix comes another alien race, the Nevian, who come from a world, poor in metals that is used as a fuel source for their starships. Out of this comes battles and alliances that conclude rather abruptly at the end of the book.

With Triplanetary we have a book that inspired others to follow with their own space sagas, but sadly the book tends to drag and in spots it is hard to follow. The Lensmen have yet to be formed, and some of the characters are written as if they are in a melodrama, which to give some defense was popular in that day. The writing is not in top form, and is hard to keep track of what is going on, and the ending comes to quick and clean. My personal recommendation for a reader is to start with the second book, First Lensman, saving Triplanatary for last. But as stated before, this is the start of a saga that had inspired many we have today.

The most famous of those inspired is J. Michael Staczynski, who gave us the five year television saga Babylon 5. One can point to the age old battle between the Arisians and the Eddorians similar to that of the Vorlons and Shadows. Similar, but different. Plus the very idea of the Lensmen can be said to have inspired the Rangers on Babylon 5. But you can also point out that the Jedi in the Star Wars series of films might have had some inspiration from this saga.

So powerful was this series that in 1966 it was a finalist for a Hugo award for All-Time Best Series (an award that I feel was handed out prematurely) losing out to Asimov's Foundation saga, then consisting of three books. For some time is was hard to get ones hands on a copy of this might legacy... until now.

For those who are members of the Science Fiction Book Club, you can pick up two 3-in-1 editions that reprint the entire series for about $15 each, a total of about $30. But the most spectacular reprint has to come from Old Earth Books out of Baltimore, Maryland that have made a facsimile of the original hard cover edition by Fantasy Press released in 1948. Inside you will be able to read the same text and enjoy the same artwork that people before us had enjoyed. The sad part is that it is getting harder and harder to find these copies that was released in 1997 and each book costs $15, totaling up to $90 for all six books, but well worth the price. The only disappointment out of the Old Earth Books editions is the forward by John Clute is hard to figure out what he is saying. Skip the forward and jump into the story.

So in closing I must recommend that you take time out to discover this saga, but save Triplanetary for last and start with the second book First Lensman.


Eirik Farwanderer
10 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

XV. A Story about L. Ron.

Back in 1998 I went to MadCon 5 in Madison, Wisconsin just for the fact that Harlan Ellison was there. I have always admired Harlan's writing and had been amused by his commentary's so I wanted to meet him.

While there he told several stories about L. Ron Hubbard, the founder of Scientology whom he knew. Many may not know that Hubbard started out as a pulp writer in many genres: westerns, war and of course science fiction. Not only was he a pulp writer, but he was a writer that didn't know when to quit. He just kept writing and writing making tomes instead of books. One only needs to see his Battlefield Earth to know that. Harlan recounted that when Hubbard bought his first electric typewriter he would feed meat packing paper into it off of a roll and would type until he the paper was in the way, then rip that 'page' off and continue on the next 'page'.

But the one story that amused the crowd was when he recounted the 'true story' on the start of his Church of Scientology. It seems that Hubbard was at a party talking with Lester Del Ray (of Del Ray Books and native Minnesotan). It seems that Hubbard was complaining to Del Ray about the all the taxes he had to pay to where Del Ray told him to 'start a religion and have a tax shelter'.

So if one wishes to believe this story or not, all I can say is that it came from the Harlan's mouth.


Eirik Farwanderer
9 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

XIV. On Forgiveness.

Forgiveness is truly the hardest thing for man to do. To wave off a wrong or harm as if nothing happened. This is against human nature where we wish to garner revenge on those that have wronged us.

If one looks we can see that there are two kinds of sin; one against God and another against man. When we turn our backs on God, take his name in vain or other slights to Him, these are the sins against God. This is when we must go to Him and ask God for forgiveness with a true and contrite heart. Because of Jesus, we are assured of his forgiveness if we do so.

But sins against man (which one could also say are against God) must be forgiven by those wronged by us. It is too easy to demand an apology from someone who did not do any harm against us, but in our hubris we think that they must. This is when harm has been done in the public eye or to someone we know. But the act is between those two (or group in some cases) that the harm had been done.

As hard as it might be we must forgive those that do truly come to us with contrite heart and do truly mean to right the wrong that was done. In all eras of history people seem to just give empty, blank apologies because they feel they have to or was made to. Their hearts are not in the task and in those cases one cannot forgive, not because they don't want to but because those that did the harm do not want to be.

But if one does truly come with that contrite heart we must find it in our heart to forgive, no matter how hard it may be. Remember what God does for us, and the price that was paid that we might be forgiven.

But we as humans must remember that there is the unforgivable sin that we are able to commit to one another. This is in the form of murder, or causing enough harm that the person is unable to do so because of vegetative states. No matter how contrite our heart is, they are unable to forgive us because they are gone and that sin remains with us until our final days. With that we must put our faith on God that he will right that wrong and wash away the harm done.


Eirik Farwanderer
9 December, 2009 Anno Domini

XIII. Going Berserker!

Fred Saberhagen follows in the path of E.E. "Doc" Smith by giving the readers his own space saga centering around alien robot killing machines that humans call: Berserkers. The first book in this series, simply called Berserker, is a collection of short stories published between 1963 and 1966 and centers around four humans in the battle against the machines,Hemphill, Mitchell Spain, Johann Karlsen and his half brother, Lord Felipe Nogara.

Unlike other serials that were made into books, such as the Foundation Series and I, Robot, Berserker does not flow between the chapters as smoothly as it could have. In fact many chapters have nothing to do with the story arc that was growing and served only as distracting, but interesting, intermissions.

The basic story is that mankind had rose to the stars and made contact with the Berserkers, a left over doomsday weapon from a long dead race and war. The Berserkers only goal is to kill all life in the universe, deeming it as "bad life". In their battle, the Berserkers have found ways to brain wash some humans into being puppets for their assaults (these being called "Goodlife") and traitors of humanity who wish to serve their own goals by helping the machines. Berserkers are a giant city sized spaceship-robots that uses smaller drones as "arms" and "eyes" for their attacks and show no mercy to humans, often deceiving and lying to them with false promises of mercy.

In the battle against the machines, Humans also face their own power struggles as they position themselves into hopeful empires, the strongest being the Esteelers lead by Lord Felipe Nogara. His half brother Johann Karlsen becomes the head of the humans resistance against the machines, and the one man the robots learn to fear. Along the way he gathers both Hemphill and Spain to lead the battle against the machines and temporary victory.

Saberhagen does not fear bringing religion and politics into the story, not as deep as Frank Herbert did with Dune, but just as effective by using it in a everyday style and not as an overall driving force in the storytelling. The most interesting factor in the religion arc are the humans who start a doomsday cult centered around the Berserkers and calling them gods.

The thing that stood out to me in the book is how the Berserkers may have influenced, partially or in full, some "enemies" we have in today's television science fiction. The first being the Borg from Star Trek: The Next Generation and Star Trek: Voyager. The Berserkers speak in an eerie multi voice, much like the Borg did in their communications, and did their assaults in giant city sized starships. The Berserkers even turned a person into a cyborg to use as a weapon against the humans much like the Borg did with Captain Picard. Yes, much of the Borg in my feelings was ripped off from the Cyberman in Doctor Who, but this aspect cannot be left out in the evolution of the Borg. Also, the Doomsday Weapon from the original Star Trek may have found influence from Saberagen's work. J. Michael Stracznsky also did a tip of the hat to Saberhagen by using a "Berserker Probe" to assault Babylon 5 in the episode 'A Day in the Strife' in its search to destroy all intelligent life.

In closing, Berserker is a fun romp into a universe of survival of the human race, and is very much a book that readers of science fiction should make room for on their lists. And if they like the first trip into this universe, there are many more books that follow in this series.

Eirik Faranderer

8 December, 2009 Anno Domini

XII. The Home of Lost Opuses.

Not too long ago I was at Goodwill in Shakopee and was aghast at what I saw: A lone stuffed Opus in a pile of teddy bears, clowns and the like.

How could anyone let go of a stuffed Opus? Don't they know the worth of a stuffed Opus is? Well, at Goodwill it was .50¢. But that is not the point! A stuffed Opus is like a happy Buddha, good luck! Rub his nose in the morning and all will be good - maybe.

I got my first Opus around 1985 and still have him with his tag. The tag is a bit worn, but he still has it. This poor lost Opus didn't have that, and his poor foot was tore a bit. So what did I do? I did what any true and good 'Bloom County' fan would have done - I rescued him!

So home he came and his poor foot was sewed, almost like new. Now he sits with my first Opus and a mini Opus I got at a convention that is dressed like Tom Baker's 4th Doctor.

But look at that mug. How could ANYONE who had an Opus let the poor thing go? He is an icon of the 80's and even into the 90's. The sign of innocence that can only be found in a flightless swimming bird that eat herring and hates walruses.

So of that date my home has become the 'Home of Lost Opuses' all. Any poor Opus that has been so cruelly and thoughtlessly discarded will be rescued by me and have a haven to live their lives out without fear of a walrus attack or British invasion of an island that was invaded by Argentina that the British colonized all those years ago.

Then again, maybe I have too much time on my hands.


Eirik Farwanderer
5 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

XI. Review of 'The Blackcollar' by Timothy Zahn.

It is a shame that many peoples first exposure to the writing of Timothy Zahn was his three cycle series of novels for the Star Wars universe. But let us thank that series for bringing Zahn into the minds of many science fiction readers who might have missed him otherwise.

For those who might not have known, Timothy Zahn had over ten years of experience writing science fiction before his Star Wars outing, first with short stories and winning the Hugo Award for best novella in 1984 with Cascade Point, then with novels starting with The Blackcollar.

The Blackcollar centers around Allen Caine who is part of a resistance against a race of aliens called the Ryqril who had defeated Earth and her colonies 30 years before. Mankind is now under the puppet rulership of humans called Collie's (short for collaborators) that are conditioned controlled to never betray the Ryqril, no matter what happens. As a result, the general population is unable to travel between the worlds once ruled by Earth. But the people of this time are also blessed with a longer life cycle thanks to a drug called Idunine.

Caine is given a task to try to travel to the former colony world of Plinry to try to gather support from the local resistance, if there is any. In doing so, he runs into a former Blackcollar commander named Damon Lathe, and by doing so is introduced to the world of the Blackcollars.

The Blackcollars are the 24th century equivalent of a cross between the US special forces and the Japanese Ninja. Using nunchakus and an advanced form of the shuriken, they are trained in close quarter combat and are conditioned with a drug called Backlash that heightens their senses, reflexes, speed and memory. It is with this force that Caine is hopeful that his mission is a success, the finding of a fleet of five Nova-class battle cruisers lost since the war. These ships could be the key in overthrowing the control of the Ryqril, and the freedom of Earth.

An authors first novel can be the one that makes or breaks a career, and this one helps Zahn's career skyrocket. The style of writing is very similar to his first Conquerors novels and has very strong characters to work with. Along the way there are turns and surprises that help the story's path that are not typical of the overused diversions that are used today, and have become very predictable.

The only compliant that I have with this novel is the handling of the possible origins of Allen Caine, and how it helps him in his undercover mission. It seems to me like a whole area of development wasn't fully touched on, or done so very hastily. I can only hope that this is dealt with a little more in the follow up novel, Blackcollar: The Backlash Mission.

The Blackcollar was published by DAW Books (ISBN: 0-87997-843-0) in 1983 and is no longer in print, but your local used book store may help you in finding a copy of this and it's follow up novel The Backlash Mission. Trust me, finding a copy is well worth your time.

Eirik Farwanderer
5 December, 2009 Anno Domini.

X. Ten of the Coolest Ships in Science Fiction.

This is a list that I did back in 2000 that I feel still holds up. There really have not been any major "oh mys" that have busted forth in the looks and designs of spaceships in science fiction since then. The 'new' Enterprise for the reboot movie just misses the mark and the Galactica from the reboot series looks like an adult toy gone wrong. That may change now with the new web series 'Buck Rogers' after looking at the ship in the teaser trailer. I do have a soft spot for those 'golden age' space craft designs. So without any further ado, here is my 10th post on 10 ships nearly 10 years after I wrote it for the first time. I love a theme.

In the visual world of science fiction in space (ie: television, movies and comics) the look of the starships that the hero's, and villains, fly around in is a very important thing to grab the viewers and convey the personality of the characters. Here is a list of ten vessels that I feel have been very successful in doing so. Feel free to agree or disagree, or even submit a list of your own.

#10. USS Enterprise, NCC-1701 (Star Trek: The Motion Picture)

For fans of the television series Star Trek, it had been a long decade since they last saw the adventures of the crew of the Starship Enterprise, and lets face it the first movie outing was shall we say - DULL! But the one thing that stood out was the Enterprise herself. Seeing her all decked out and updated was like seeing ones high school sweetheart after ten years, and my god, she looks better then she did when you dated her in school! A little sleeker, more detailed, and better lighting, made you believe that the Enterprise was up there and ready to fly into the 'final frontier'.

#9. The TARDIS (Doctor Who)

Not very impressive looking, a blue police box sitting in a junk yard. That is the first view people saw of the TARDIS when watching the first episode of Doctor Who. Little did we know what laid behind those doors of that police box, and what a concept the BBC gave us for a space and time vessel on a children's show in the early 1960's. Larger on the inside then the outside, maybe the size of a small city. If working right, it can change shape to fit in its surroundings, and can travel anywheres in time and space at a blink of an eye. It is safe to say that the TARDIS is the longest serving cast member of Doctor Who, outlasting ten lead actors and a legion of supporting cast members. She had a personality that came off on screen, that made you believe that this might be more of a living entity then a machine, and has in its own way, burned its image into the minds of millions of people.

#8. Scanner One (Atari Force)

In the mid 1980's, DC comics tried to give it's readers a more adult science fiction comic with a story arc that lasted over several issue. It was a tie in with the ATARI computer game company with the first five issues offered in several game packs. But it showed enough interest to become a 20 issue series with one special and was named one of the 5 best comics for the year 1985. The ship looked like an off shoot of the stylized A that ATARI used as its logo, but it worked. It used a multi phased type of faster the light drive that took it into universes that existed next to ours (called the Multiverse) in such a way that it could "take off" in a closed off hanger. No heavy weapon, super shields, it was just a glorified taxi to take our hero's to their adventures. But that's all the heros needed to find adventure and save the universe.

#7. The Leonov (2010)

Bulky and ugly, the Leonov gave movie viewers a very realistic image of what a space vessel would look like in the near future more then any other film at that time. In fact, Arthur Clarke once said that the Discovery should have looked like the Leonov and the other way around to better show the natural "evolution" of space vessels. It was one of the first, if not the first, to show the rotating section on the outside of the ship that would produce gravity for its crew. Yes, the Discovery had one also, but it was all covered up inside its hull and could not be seen. There is also no doubt that the Leonov helped inspire the Omega-class destroyers seen in Babylon 5 almost 10 years later.

#6. USS Enterprise, NCC-1701-E (Star Trek: First Contact)

Again, another Star Trek vessel appears in these pages, and for good reason. This is the ship that should have been used for Star Trek: The Next Generation instead of the bulky ovals that was known in that series. Sleek and detailed, this is the type of ship that one could be seen taking over the legacy of the Enterprise line. The sad thing about it, though, is that it may have less screen time then the before mentioned for-runner (that having only been seen 6 times while the E model has been seen only three) because the producers wish not to share it with the other Star Trek franchises. This is a ship too good to waste on a dying franchise, and begs to be seen more often. Lets hope that it will, but with the new 'Star Trek' reboot, I doubt it.

#5. The Eagles (Space: 1999)

Gerry Anderson's big live action foray into science fiction after his UFO series had big potential, sadly it had a rather silly plot of the Moon being used as the space vehicle to transports the shows hero's to their adventure. But the one thing that burned into my mind was the Eagle space craft used by the Moonbase Alpha personnel to get from point A to point B. As a space craft used in low to zero gravity, it was very believable. Having sections able to be taken out and replaced with others for specific job duties is a idea that NASA has in mind for future space programs, and in fact, the space shuttles ability to take modular science modules in the cargo bay helps see this onscreen science fiction become science fact. But as a vessel used inside normal atmospheres, it became typical Hollywood (or in this case, British Television) crap. But maybe one day the Eagles will see their use on a future moon base.

#4. The El Dorado (Buck Rogers in the 25th Century)

The only time I saw this ship was in a book of model making that a friend Charles Beardshear picked up. Inside they had ideas on what to do with your science fiction models, such as the Eagles from Space: 1999 or how to turn your AMT USS Enterprise model into a Federation Tug seen in the Star Fleet Technical Manuel by Franz Joseph. But inside those pages was a section on how to make the El Dorado used by Buck Rogers in the comic series. It was the typical sleek cigar shaped ship with the rivets running down the side and multi tubed engine, but with the golden paint job over her, she made the image of the "classic" 30's space ship. Makes me wish I had picked up a copy of the book that sat on the shelves of Hub Hobbies for years.

#3. War Cruiser Ajax (Flash Gordon)

To follow in the line of the El Dorado, the makers of the 1980 film Flash Gordon did allot of work in paying a campy homage to the 1930's serials about Flash Gordon. In that homage the Mongo War Cruiser Ajax stands out very much to me. Keeping to the style of those 30's space craft, it was 'cigar' shaped, sleek, had stylized fins and something new -- a deck for the soldiers to defend the ship from the Hawkmen. Plus, it had a convenient pike in the front to spear the bad guys when crashing a wedding. Yes, not good science, but fun science fantasy.

#2. Millennium Falcon (Star Wars Trilogy)

When one first saw this ship, you just didn't know what to make of it. It was a saucer with a cockpit off the side and a giant radar dish mounted on top. Then besides that, it was marred and dented- - nothing like a starship we had been shown until then. It was all part of George Lucas's view of a universe where things had that used look. The Falcon was a hot rod starship where things broke down at the wrong time, and in Episode IV: A New Hope had dice hanging in the cockpit. It didn't take fans of the movie series to fall in love with this ship, and I'm sure that a level of shock crossed them when word got out that the Falcon was destined to be destroyed in Episode VI: Return of the Jedi. Lets just be grateful that Lucas changed his mind on that idea.

And Now...

#1. The Excalibur (Babylon 5: A Call to Arms, Crusade)

As the television show Babylon 5 came to an end, TNT television green lighted a new series based in the same universe. To be based on a ship instead of a space station like Babylon 5, the creators of Crusade had to design a ship that would grab the attention of the viewers, and grab they did. The ship was a cross of Human/Mimbari/Vorlon technology to create the first in the series of White Star-class Destroyers to battle the forces that would try to destroy the alliance created after the Shadow War. About a mile and a half long and using a gravity drive to propel it through space, she made one sleek and mean looking ship that would have any hostile being thinking twice before taking her on. There is the Vorlon super weapon that is emitted from the upside down Y 'fins' at the aft of the ship that can stop just about anything that is thrown against her, but with one flaw. Firing the super weapon causes a major power drain that lasts about a minute before the ship is recharged. When the Crusade creators showed the design of the Excalibur to NASA's Jet Propulsion Laboratory, they exclaimed that they would love to take the ship on a 'ride around the block' if it really existed. So one could presume that in the future some NASA space ship designs might just bear some resemblance to this impressive ship. Its just sad that TNT had a major stupid moment and canceled the show at 13 episodes before it even aired because I would loved to have followed this ship on its "five year voyage".

Some Very Notable Mentions that we had no room for because 10 is still 10 and not 11 and so on:

#1. Planet Express Ship (Futurama)

When Simpsons/Futurama creator Matt Groening was a young lad, he was an avid science fiction reader. So needless to say that his comic homage to this genre had a blend of the old, with a mix of the new. He was able to take that classic look of the 30's space craft and blend it into the ones we are familiar with now today. The ship does not have a name, and the captain is a one eyed alien (really mutant). But this ship has found a way to be able to become a 'believable' entity to this viewer, and secretly would love to have a trip on it some day. (sigh)

#2. Imperial Star Destroyer (Star Wars Trilogy)

Lets face it, the opening moments of Episode IV: A New Hope blew people out of their seats when a fairly large starship (Leia's corvette) flew across the screen followed by a giant wedge shaped monster chasing after it. It's amazing that such a simple shaped starship (a wedge with a bridge tower on top) could imposed such an image of evil and fear to the viewer but the Star Destroyer did a great job. The only thing that came along to top it in the series was Darth Vader's Super Star Destroyer.

#3. Battlestar Galactica (Battlestar Galactica)

After Star Wars came out, every studio had to have their own "Star Wars". Universal tapped Glen Larson who had been working on his own idea Adam's Ark since 1974. Out of that idea came Battlestar Galactica. The Galactica was part of a fleet of 12 Battlestars designed to protect the 12 Colonies of Man from the forces of the cyborg lizard race known as the Cylons. The ship was a mile long (the same length as the Imperial Star Destroyer of Star Wars fame) with two giant fighter bays that hang off the side of the Battlestar that were almost the length of the ship. On the aft section, almost a quarter of the ships mass, sat the two giant engines that pushed the ship through the sea of stars. The show may have come from the "Star Wars" race, but the Galactica was an original of her own.

#4. The Klingon D-7 Battlecruiser (Star Trek Original Series)

If there was a ship that seemed to be more advanced then the original USS Enterprise of the original series, it was the D-7 Battlecruiser. Sleek and swift looking, the ship was a perfect complement to her "enemy" Enterprise. She had more compact engines then the Enterprise, making it seem like the Klingons might have been slightly more advanced then the Federation and a smaller silhouette that was ideal for a combat starship as not to make it too easy for the enemy to lock their weapons on it. Seen only in the series third season, a more updated version was seen in the movie series with a much added bonus - - rear firing torpedoes.

So this is my list of 10 (plus a few) of the coolest starship in science fiction.Let us hope that we will see more original designs in the future from our writers, film makers and artists.

Eirik Farwanderer

5 December, 2009 Anno Domini

IX. One of the Great Christmas Albums of all Time.

Now that it is the season I have to let you all know what I think is one of the best Christmas albums of all time: A Charlie Brown Christmas.

The late Vince Guaraldi just seemed to hit it right with the blend of jazz and holiday music that makes it a timeless classic. What also makes it a great is using real 'normal' children singing the songs.

I just picked the CD up for the first time after years and years of telling myself that I would, and what a joy to be able to listen to it when I want to, not when the radio station gets around to these songs on their playlist.

So I guess you know what I will be playing to death until December 25th when I have to put it away until the next Christmas season...

...and you know, I will not get tired of it.


Eirik Farwanderer
28 November, 2009 Anno Domini

VIII. The Lost Holiday?

It seems to me that we have lost a holiday and replaced it with a fake holiday. The push for Christmas has seemed to erase Thanksgiving from the mind of retailers so that they can celebrate 'Black Friday', the new holiday for November.

To see the Christmas items in the store BEFORE Halloween just depresses me for Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays out there. But how can you push SALES when everyone just about shuts down for that Thursday. Plus you don't give 'Thanksgiving Gifts' which puts a crimp on sales.

So now it's Halloween, Black Friday and Christmas being the new big three holidays for this time of year. But what a depressing name 'Black Friday' is. It sounds like the name that should be given for Good Friday. I know that the 'Black' is good for business because they move into the 'black' from the 'red' on the balance sheets. But remember another 'black' day in history? 'Black Tuesday' when the market crashed in 1929. That was not good for the balance sheets, that's for sure.

'Black Friday' is not a holiday for me in any way. I do not go for the commercial end of Christmas, I remember what it is for: The birth of Christ. For other faiths it is their time also for remembrance and not shopping.

So I'll just keep Thanksgiving and let the others have that depressing Friday to themselves.


Eirik Farwanderer
28 November, 2009 Anno Domini

VII. Penguin Lust and Other Things.

Berkeley Breathed was WRONG! DEAD WRONG! That is something I am happy about. He just didn't think that people like me were out there. People who wanted EVERY strip of 'Bloom County' available to us. They did it with 'The Far Side' and 'Calvin and Hobbs', how could they not do it for poor old Opus, Milo, Binkley, Steve Dallas and Bill?

I was a raved fan of 'Bloom County' and still am. Sadly I did not get into the two follow up strips 'Outland' and 'Opus'. I was a 'Bloom County' man all the way. It was the last strip I would read in the funny pages. Save the best for last and all that.

But alas, poor old Berkeley Breathed didn't think that 'Bloom County' was that well remembered to have every strip published. He was proven wrong by the throngs of fans out there like me. Now my number one item on my Christmas list is the first of five volumes of the 'Bloom County Library' so that I may see strips I have never seen, or only once when first printed. It was THE political satire strip out there with the best stuff every four years when Bill and Opus would run for the highest office in the land. It did not matter that Opus was born outside the US in South America and that Bill was dead (sounds like Obama and Biden), they always ran the good race for that office...

...and lost.

But now those that love good humor at everyone expense have won. 'Bloom County' may never come back as a daily, or even weekly strip. But at least we had the funny pages of long ago and the books to prove it.


Eirik Farwanderer
25 November, 2009 Anno Domini

VI. What can I say? I am Hooked.

What can I say? I am hooked. I remember back in 1983 when a 4 hour Science Fiction television event happened. It was called 'V'. It had me hooked from the start and I ate up every minute of the mini series. Then that next year came the 6 hour 'V: The Final Battle' that gave us new characters to love, but started to weaken a bit. Then BOOM, they dropped that bomb which was 'V: The Series'. My heart was crushed and the whole 'V' thing faded away...

...until now.

I have never been a real fan of this 're-imagining' of TV shows and movies. They always seemed to fall WAY short of the original and filled with politically correct garbage, which means that it was 'safe dribble' for the networks or studios to run with. Why did we need Wil Smith in a 'Wild, Wild West' remake? Why do we need to have a mindless 'Lost in Space' movie? Please do NOT get me started on 'BattleTrek Galactiprise'! I have not even seen the newest 'Star Trek'!

When I heard that they were going to start 'V' all over again the first thing through my Dane Bramaged little mind was 'oh no, not again'. But for some reason I watched that first episode, sadly coming in a bit late. I was hooked. This is not PC garbage at all! This was believable! How the V's had sent sleepers ahead to prepare. How they bring 'Hope' and 'Change' to a people that want it unable to see the price they have to pay for it. How there are those V that do not like what is going on and are rebels against their own kind.

When one looks at history you can see how these all have been fitting together so far in the first 4 episode that have aired on ABC. Even the infighting between family members. Science Fiction has suffered lately in television in my humble opinion with the last great show being Babylon 5. I had been wondering what the next show would be that could grab my attention. This one is it!

If you love SF TV watch this! If you just love good TV watch this! Turn off the 'reality' shows and see what television can really do!

Entertain with a great story.

Erirk Farwanderer
24 November, 2009 Anno Domini